Feeling like you are the victim in a situation is a common reaction. “But that isn’t fair,” or “That’s not right!” is something you likely say to yourself many times a day.
Feeling victimized and being a victim, though, are two different things. Learning how to stop feeling victimized will allow you to reclaim your personal power and live the life you have always wanted.
Why Being a Victim Doesn’t Work
When you decide that you are a victim in any situation, you only end up feeling worse. Most of the time, you choose to be a victim of life’s circumstances or your own failures or missteps because you think it will make you feel better.
But it does not. It has the opposite effect.
While playing the victim can give you momentary love, concern, or care from others, it also robs you of your own power. Being a victim means you are powerless, that you are fearful, and unhappy,
And you feel like you don’t have any way to turn the situation around. This will leave you feeling even worse about yourself after you are done being victimized.
When you feel powerless, you automatically feel unhappy. It is nearly impossible to be happy and also powerless at the same time.
So, if you want to stop feeling miserable, you must take back your personal power and decide that you are not going to let someone else or some circumstance in life rob you of your happiness.
Accepting Responsibility
The simple truth that many people do not really get or understand is this, no one else in this world is responsible for you except you.
You can be affected by other people, but only you determine the emotions you experience and your reactions to those people. You decide. You choose to be a victim or claim your power and move forward.
Your happiness is not dependent upon others unless you make that choice.
When you embrace your personal power, your pleasure is solely determined by how you choose to react to life’s inevitable blunders and negative offerings.
Accepting personal responsibility does not mean you don’t experience pain in life. It just means you decide that while, yes, that hurt, you recognize your role in what led to that pain, and you want to move beyond it.
You have determined that your well-being is more important than dwelling on the hurt. This choice is empowering because you consciously decide to do the challenging thing by learning and growing from your negative experience.
How to Reclaim Your Personal Power
There are many ways to stop playing the victim while regaining your internal power and accepting responsibility for your life.
First, you must become an advocate for yourself. When you know your value, you demand what you feel you deserve. This means you do not settle, which prevents you from feeling taken advantage of by others.
You must shift your mindset about happiness, too. Knowing that others have no control over your own happiness is vital.
Stop comparing yourself to others, and no longer allow others’ opinions to force you to make decisions that are not right for you.
Finally, you must recognize that it is not your responsibility to make anyone else happy.
Just as you must accept your role in your happiness, so must they. Letting go of this notion can release you from the guilt and victimhood you may feel about these responsibilities.
One Final Thoughts
Being a victim is a choice. Learning from the lessons life hands you is also a choice. One relinquishes your power while the other embraces it. You must choose which is right for you, but only one will allow you to reclaim your personal power and realize true happiness in life.
That choice is in your hands!
